The Sound of Gavels

Have you ever looked at someone who just had a baby and wondered how you didn’t know she was pregnant? Or, have you ever listened to a friend’s post-break-up story and wondered how you missed every single thing you thought would be obvious? Worse still, have you ever taken the time out to listen to why a person killed themselves?
The lives we lead in social circles and on social networks are really different from the lives we actually lead. Our relationships seem perfect, our clothes seem perfect and our biggest problems seem to be food cravings. One sad tweet or Facebook status and you’re labelled an attention seeker. It takes a show of emotion to seem like the miserable person who complains all the time about every single thing (I’m not saying those don’t exist, its just easy to fall under their label with a single sad tweet) but life really is hard. It doesn’t mean that we’re all battling the same issues or that we all have the same sorrows when its time to finally call it a day, it just means that to each of us, our lives seem hard.
The phrase ‘do not judge somebody because they sin differently from you’ is one of the most hypocritical things I’ve ever read AND heard. Every time you hear a juicy story, in your mind, you’ve already picked who was wrong and who was right. That IS what judging is, isn’t it? Being the decider of right and wrong? Somebody had a baby in her teens and you all point fingers. Aren’t you having sex too? Are you married? Probably not. So why put yourself on a pedestal? Some people like to be strong, and I’ll give them credit for it but it doesn’t take away the pain of being judged.
The fact that every one of us is judgemental in one way or the other keeps us from knowing what our friends are really going through and also keeps our minds busy with assumptions. You don’t tell people what it is you’re going through, most likely because you know what you would say if you heard that exact same thing about someone else. Someone could say they’re sad and write over a hundred reasons why and nobody would really care. Unless they died, of course. Ooooh, social networks and their abundant ‘pity’ when a person dies.
A lot of us pretend to be happy and pretend to be living the ultimate lives. But, at the end of the day when you have enough time to your thoughts… Come on. Who do you really think you’re fooling? Smiles are the most common forms of make-up. I wear them too, I’m not pretending. A lot of the time, its easier to smile and carry on than to answer millions of questions and hear a gavel every single time you do. It doesn’t mean its not hard or it won’t eat you up but no matter how much pain you feel, its nothing compared to your pain accompanied by the sound of a gavel; judged.

The New Respect To The Dead

This is pretty short buuut I think its necessary 🙂 so, here goes…

Death has never been a secret. Its not mandatory for anyone to mourn alone and that’s why we have funerals. Knowing that you’re not alone in something helps you to pick yourself up because even though you know for certain that they couldn’t possibly feel the exact same way you do, at least you’re not alone.
Social networks however, almost use death as an attention seeking method, which in my opinion, a lot of people see as respect when it is really a hypocritical kind of respect. *drumroll* It is DISRESPECTFUL. The point of a funeral is to pay your respects to the dead and support the affected living but what good is your status and profile picture change when neither of them knew you?
Now, you’ll go on and say I’m being rude or whatever, but picture this: you see somebody around, never really gotten to talking to them. I mean, the most you’ve ever said is a ‘walking-past-hi’. What business do they have putting your deceased parents as their picture to wish YOU condolences? Condolences that you won’t even see or get, condolences that go to them when they know neither of you. Attention seeking.
Death is not a secret, its good that its public. But giving the longest speeches at funerals or putting the most sad face emoticons on your profile does not mean you loved them more. Stop it, its not a competition. I’m NOT saying every tribute is an attention seeking stunt. Sometimes we genuinely feel bad for someone and have no other way to reach them. Your heart goes out to them, we understand. But when your life stops for a moment to feed off of people’s sorrow, you, my friend, need to rearrange the patterns in your life.